some like it

watched "Some Like it Hot" in the park tonight against a backdrop of the city, floating upright rectangles with little lights. I waited for Marilyn Monroe to make an appearance, I had not seen the movie before but knew she was in it. I thought the crowd would make some collective noise when she appeared, I thought that there would be an expressed sense of waiting for her as I was, but there wasn't. I expected the icon worship, but no.

Everytime I see her in something I want to pay attention to what it was about her, or who she was. I can't imagine that this person got to be a person in the context of her arrival, her presence creating the stardom phenomenon. She evokes a very tactile thing, she's fluffy, in a sort of literal sense. she's soft, full, something about substantial vacancy, I don't know. the film was made three years before she died, she was 33, my age. I can't help but wonder what went on, what that vacancy was, who lived behind it, and where they lived. I'm sorry you had to go like that. I wonder who you were.